


Night Terrors

by cagetraumasam



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cuddling, F/M, Pre-Series, Stanford Era, sleep issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-07
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-10-24 00:34:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17694191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cagetraumasam/pseuds/cagetraumasam
Summary: The thing about Sam is that he doesn’t sleep.





	Night Terrors

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, friends!
> 
> This has been sitting in my docs for a few months and isn't beta'd at all but I just found the motivation to finish it. It sounds like it's going to be a little angsty at first, but then it's...not? I don't know what this is to be quite honest! I just wanted to write something cute with Sam and Jess while also acknowledging that she was a person with personality and that while they loved each other very much, they may have had issues like this. I feel like as a fandom, we have a tendency to romanticize their relationship and act like it was perfect, and I'm totally guilty of that, too, but I thought it would be fun to show the idea that two people can love each other and still get frustrated on occasion. But at the end of the day, this is a very silly fic wherein Jess really just loves Sam, Sam really loves Jess (and dogs), and they both need sleep but only one is trying to, lmao.

The thing about Sam is that he doesn’t sleep. Or, well, he  _ does _ , but it’s a lot harder for him than it is for Jess—in fact, the only other person she’s ever known to have this much trouble is her cousin Malcolm, but even he’s been doing better since he got started on those sleeping meds the doctor gave him.

Of course, Sam shrugs off any and all suggestions that maybe he should visit the campus clinic. “It’s not something they can fix,” he says a couple of weeks after they move in together, the first time she brings it up. “My brain just doesn’t stop.”

There’s a little part of her that thinks that it must be something more than that. An overactive brain explains how hard it is for him to fall asleep, maybe, but it doesn’t quite fill in the blanks on why he sometimes wakes up gasping, with wide eyes, or else dazed and disoriented. It doesn’t explain why sometimes he seems almost  _ scared _ to fall asleep.

Jess tries not to push, she really does, because they’ve had this talk before and she knows that there are some things that he’s just not able to share yet. And honestly, she gets it. It’s not like she doesn’t have her stuff, too. Everyone has something. And she knows it’s not like it’s because of her specifically, she knows these are things that he doesn’t seem able to share with anyone at all, so she really, really tries to just let him be.

But it’s just not  _ healthy _ to have to work yourself to the brink of exhaustion the way Sam does to get a measly four hours of rest (on good days!), so if she hints here and there, if she maybe recruits some of their other friends (Rebecca and Zach and Luis and, god, even  _ Brady, _ ) to put the idea in his head, well, who can blame her? She’s doing it because she loves him, after all. It’s entirely unselfish. She loves him and she cares about his well-being. She’s innocent, really.

Except, okay, so, maybe it’s a  _ little _ bit selfish. Most of the meddling is born out of a place of concern for her boyfriend, but, if she’s being totally honest, well…the thing about  _ Jess _ is that she  _ likes  _ sleep. A lot. She’s always been a firm believer in getting the recommended eight hours, and even though that’s not always possible on a college schedule, she does usually manage a decent, respectable amount. But since moving in with Sam, things are a little different.

It’s not like he does it on purpose; he’s usually very considerate, and when he comes crawling to bed three or four hours after she’s already fallen asleep, he’s careful to be soft-footed. Sure, it would be nice to sometimes fall asleep with her boyfriend’s arms around her more often, but for the most part, it’s a non-issue.

On nights like tonight, though, when she’s only been in bed for a couple of minutes and he slides in beside her, clearly not tired but feeling guilty for letting her fall asleep alone, things get…interesting. (Not the fun kind of interesting, either, though they have had a few legendary nights that were totally worth the need for an extra shot of espresso the next morning.)

Like, okay. Jess may not totally buy that it’s the only reason for his sleep issues, but in these moments, she definitely believes him when he says that sometimes he can’t stop his brain from going a thousand miles a minute.

“You still awake?” he says as he pushes himself under the covers, voice a careful whisper in case she’s already drifted off. It makes her smile because, yeah, sure, maybe she has an easier time with it all than him, but even she’s not able to fall asleep in under three minutes. That would have to be some kind of record.

She rolls over to look at him. “Only vaguely,” she says, but she’s still smiling, and he’s smiling right back. Right now, she can’t even find it in her to be annoyed that he’s keeping her awake, because his lips look so pink and soft, even in the dim light, and really, it would be a crime not to lean in and place a gentle kiss on them. He makes a sound like a little breath of laughter, and even in the dark, she can see that his ears are tinged a light red, and  _ god _ , he’s such a dork.

She rests her head against the pillow again and her eyes flutter closed, but not a moment later:

“If I was a dog, what kind of dog do you think I’d be?”

She doesn’t even bother opening her eyes.

“ _ Sam _ .”

“What?” he asks, and she has to force herself not to laugh at the note of genuine confusion in his voice.

“It’s midnight, okay? Just—just try to sleep. For me. I bet it’ll be easier than you think,” she says, wincing a little afterward because, okay, fine, maybe that was insensitive and oversimplified, but to be fair, she’s _ tired _ . He doesn’t seem to notice, though, or if he does, he doesn’t mind. Jess sighs a little before letting her hand wander over to where his lies over the covers in between their bodies and intertwines them. He squeezes a little, and for a moment, she thinks he’s fallen silent for the night, but—

“Come on, Jess. Please? Humor me? You’re way better at this game than Luis. He always picks a golden retriever.”

Jess snorts and winks one eye open. “He doesn’t know any others. He’s just not a dog person like you.”

“Like  _ us _ ,” Sam corrects, grin getting wider, and Jess shakes her head disbelievingly, even as she laughs. Damn his boyish charm.

_ Better play along,  _ she thinks. She opens her other eye to stare wistfully at the the blinking clock on the bedside table before she shifts her eyes up and down Sam’s body.

“Definitely not a golden retriever,” she says finally. “I mean, I could see some of the qualities there for sure, but they like people way more than you do.”

Sam touches a hand to his chest, mock-offended. “I like people!”

Jess rolls her eyes, but even she can tell there’s no menace behind it. “Yeah, but you’re a total introvert, and you have to admit, you’re not the  _ least _ trust-issue-addled person alive.”

“Well, there are some bad things out there. I mean. People. There are bad people,” he clarifies, and she doesn’t furrow a brow or comment. She’s long-since gotten past his weird way of choosing his words oh so carefully and flinching at himself when he seems to think he messes up. She doesn’t understand it, not at all, but she knows that commenting on it will only make him feel even worse, so she doesn’t. She plays the game.

“That’s my point, though! Golden retrievers love people so much that it blinds them to the reality that some of those people are bad. I think you’re more like a… hm,” she stops, pretending to think for a moment, but she sort of already knows. (Fine, she likes this game, too. Sue her.) “Oh, I know! You’re totally a Saint Bernard!”

It’s a little hard to see in much detail, given the dark, but Jess is pretty sure she can see Sam’s facial features etching out careful consideration. “I guess I can see it, but I’d love to know your reasoning.”

“Well,” Jess smiles a little, despite herself, because this is totally the fun part, “they’re pretty big dogs, right? So you would think that they’d be all macho and aggressive, but they’re actually really sweet and gentle. And that definitely reminds me of you. Plus, they’re super smart, and they’re like, protective, but not without reason, and they’re definitely not ever intentionally cruel or mean-spirited.”

“Oh,” Sam says quietly, clearly unsure what to do with all those compliments coming his way. “I mean, uh. Thanks?”

She leans in and cuddles against his chest, yawning. “Any time. Apparently,” she smirks, and  she can feel him looking down even though his eyes are closed again. Being under his gaze always just feels…right. It nevers feels judgemental or evaluating, it just feels like love and a little astonishment at the thought that they get to be together. She knows the feeling.

It’s nice, being in his arms like this, and she’s in that space between consciousness and sleep, now, when she hears his voice again.

“Do you think dogs  _ know _ how much we love them?”

“Sam?”

“Hm?”

“Go the fuck to sleep.”

“‘‘Kay.”

He’s so fucking dumb. She loves him so fucking much. Jesus fucking Christ.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, friends! I hope you enjoyed it! <3 Catch me on tumblr @cagetraumasam!


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